Dyin Read’s Space Pirate Slave Fights
<<Notnek and Hopskotch go off on an adventure with Bat Max and Mack TruckYeah.
they are all forced to fight other slaves on space ship, home to a traveling gladiator
reality show. Bat Max used to call himself Fat before he was mauled by a zombie
deer, since surviving that he felt the need to upgrade his name to a more superhero
sounding title. Ergo Bat Max was born from the bad tempered shit bandit of the
Oklahellmouth. Mack TruckYeah is an escape convict and the loan survivor of the
first outbreak of Me (the Virus, Duh?!) The two have been battling in Dyin Read’s
Pirate slave fights ever since the outbreak on current dimension earth>>
<<Pirate slave fights under the leadership of Dyin Read, a group of
illuminati economists used public funds provided by the endowment for the
National Pentagon Radio to purchase a space ship and a crew headed by Pirate Paul
and the space hobos to kidnap and/or bribe fighters from every dimension into
becoming combatants in the Pirate slave fights. the winners of the fights get to go
free or join the illuminati’s private armies. not any easy decision. the free life
means always knowing that you are being watched and possibly becoming a pawn
in some other illuminati scheme. joining the armies means financial security.
health care, housing, a steady income and regular meals, not just for the fighter,
but for some of the fighter’s immediate family unit as well. so after fighting for
their life, most combatants join the illuminati, or the horde, or the ‘Merican’
military, or whoever the Pirate Space Hobo’s are recruiting for on that given day in
that given dimension. Pirate Paul recognizes Hopskotch and Notnek from his home
time space in Normal Towne. Pirate Paul frees the two humans from his former
time and dimension of residence out of nostalgia for an age that has passed Paul by.
continuing on in his government/illuminati sponsored work, Pirate Paul sends Mack
TruckYeah and Bat Max to fight to the death. Pirate Paul offers Bat and Mack a
week of drinking and training with the other would-be soldier combatants before
they start fighting.
During all of this Hopskotch speaks out against the forced fighting. Notnek tries to
quiet Hopskotch, but he pesters Pirate Paul about his profession long enough
where Pirate Paul decides to have Hopskotch Sunday frozen. Hopskotch Sunday is
frozen in an ice cold nano-bot chemical gel. it climbs up his legs and seeps in his
pores. Hopskotch Sunday screams as he becomes a living statue. everyone in the
space ship is quiet after Pirate Paul immobilizes Hopskotch Sunday.>>
“I try to be nice, but this work must be done; or I won’t be around anymore to be nice to
anyone.”, says Pirate Paul.
<<pirate Paul’s Hobo comrades nod and grumble agreements. Notnek holds up his
hands and says,>> “Hey, I totally like your style. Kill ‘em with kindness. Just kill them.
Am I right?”, says Notnek
“Don’t make me freeze you too ass clown. Hobos, send these two humans back to earth.
They have a meeting to attend at the Normal Towne City Hall, I believe.”, says Pirate
<<the Space Pirate Ship steers around a giant spider weaving a web in space and
heads back toward the Milky Way and to Earth. Notnek and Hopskotch Sunday are
teleported off the space ship into the women’s restroom of Normal Towne City